I truly enjoy the time I have cycling to school in the mornings. I like thinking in motion.
For sure, the streets are frenetic; school kids, college kids, salaried workers and old people sweeping in front of their homes, it's all out there, agitated destinations towards...I mean, really, is most work really that rewarding?
And me, in the same frenetic spin cycle, pardon the pun.
Feeling like a fish out of water with this 'work thing'.
'Why am I here? What am I doing this for?' went through my head at each traffic light -and they were cruel to me this morning - red, red, red, red, red - so I had five 'reds' to repeat the 'whyamiherewhatamidoingthisfor' mantra.
I understand the whyamihere - it was just a big fck up - but what I fail to understand, after observing, day in, day out, just like y'all do on your respective commutes, however long or short they may be, is the 'whatamidoingthisfor'.
For sure, money.
But then I looked at a man in his mid-60s, dressed in a suit, carrying a briefcase, walking toward the train station.
'He still has to work'?!, I asked myself.
Then another man, in his late 60's, who scared the crap out of me the other night when I cycled past his tailors shop as he pulled the shutter down with a loud crash, who opens up every day before 8am- I see him putting a shade cloth over one of his cabinets in the morning, to protect the contents from the sun- and I thought to myself,
'These guys are still working into their 60's, and they've been working since the day they left school, working while they brought up families, the children have fled the nest, but they are still working', and I thought to myself,
'Is this what life for humans in 'developed' countries has become, this default acceptance of a work-laden life.
And it was kind of depressing, but not too depressing, because nobody forced such folks to tread such similar lives of default, they chose every step of the way, and it made me wonder where human curiosity for the planet has disappeared to, and whilst not judging those who wind up spending the bulk of their lives within a 20km radius of where they live, it made me wonder where I got my curiosity from, where I got this powerful urge to escape employment as soon as I possibly could, which meant avoiding getting into debt because one cannot stop working if you have to pay off debt, it's just not possible, so avoiding all that debt bullshit, buying big things for cash in cheap places, and so on, you know the story, was all because the default that I had observed from childhood, into teenage years, and beyond, just seemed to be so much of a waste of time - ha ha, the radio just said, 'waste of time'.
But each to their own, was just thinkin', that's all, thinkin' at each red stoplight, as I watched school kids, college kids, salarymen, and old people sweeping in front of their homes, was just thinkin', 'na, this isn't for me, I've gotta get off this ride, I've been on it long enough.'
For sure, the streets are frenetic; school kids, college kids, salaried workers and old people sweeping in front of their homes, it's all out there, agitated destinations towards...I mean, really, is most work really that rewarding?
And me, in the same frenetic spin cycle, pardon the pun.
Feeling like a fish out of water with this 'work thing'.
'Why am I here? What am I doing this for?' went through my head at each traffic light -and they were cruel to me this morning - red, red, red, red, red - so I had five 'reds' to repeat the 'whyamiherewhatamidoingthisfor' mantra.
I understand the whyamihere - it was just a big fck up - but what I fail to understand, after observing, day in, day out, just like y'all do on your respective commutes, however long or short they may be, is the 'whatamidoingthisfor'.
For sure, money.
But then I looked at a man in his mid-60s, dressed in a suit, carrying a briefcase, walking toward the train station.
'He still has to work'?!, I asked myself.
Then another man, in his late 60's, who scared the crap out of me the other night when I cycled past his tailors shop as he pulled the shutter down with a loud crash, who opens up every day before 8am- I see him putting a shade cloth over one of his cabinets in the morning, to protect the contents from the sun- and I thought to myself,
'These guys are still working into their 60's, and they've been working since the day they left school, working while they brought up families, the children have fled the nest, but they are still working', and I thought to myself,
'Is this what life for humans in 'developed' countries has become, this default acceptance of a work-laden life.
And it was kind of depressing, but not too depressing, because nobody forced such folks to tread such similar lives of default, they chose every step of the way, and it made me wonder where human curiosity for the planet has disappeared to, and whilst not judging those who wind up spending the bulk of their lives within a 20km radius of where they live, it made me wonder where I got my curiosity from, where I got this powerful urge to escape employment as soon as I possibly could, which meant avoiding getting into debt because one cannot stop working if you have to pay off debt, it's just not possible, so avoiding all that debt bullshit, buying big things for cash in cheap places, and so on, you know the story, was all because the default that I had observed from childhood, into teenage years, and beyond, just seemed to be so much of a waste of time - ha ha, the radio just said, 'waste of time'.
But each to their own, was just thinkin', that's all, thinkin' at each red stoplight, as I watched school kids, college kids, salarymen, and old people sweeping in front of their homes, was just thinkin', 'na, this isn't for me, I've gotta get off this ride, I've been on it long enough.'
11 comments:
oh woman, have you been peeking into my mind?!
And what a mind. It makes me feel sad when I read your posts.
You furget that lots of people actually enjoy working. I'll exclude myself and mine from that one though!
Fuff
'each to their own' is the bit that shows that I don't forget.
I'm not so up my own arse that I can't consider alternative lifestyles to my own me me me free willy one.
Way to put down the people who actually contribute something to the rest of the world, Maria, rather than just take what they want (YOU) and then complain that more people can't be like them. Good thing the doctor who saved your life and all the complex support structures (thousands of people doing their humdrum jobs everyday) that needed to be in place for that person to be trained well enough to perform that surgery on you, didn't have your princessy attitude. Everything you own, including your boat, two flats and the voluminous junk you accumulate in your daily travels was made by someone who gave a damn or had to work by dint of necessity. Rant barely started......
Please continue....
Oh dear, are you getting a bit bi-polar again :(
Really? How so? And why should it bother you? You're just an anon reading a crap blog.
Hey M.
I totally agree with you. You really, really need to read John Ralston Saul's "The Unconscious Civilizaton": it really speaks to what you are talking about here.
People do work too long and just accept it as the norm. Granted, there are people that love their jobs, but I think they are few and far between. And those that don't like there jobs don't seem to see a way out. I'm always amazed when someone drops 60 or 80k on a car. I think: you could retire two or three years earlier if you had bought something more practical. It's weird, what peoples' priorities are.
I want out as soon as possible. And, like you, if it means forgoing Mulberry handbags and buttock implants: so be it. Life is for living, not for working until your 65 and retiring and then dying of a heart attack.
Hey, I wrote that book, it's my pen name.
;)
I will order it. Love getting book recs. from others.
Thanks for concurring.
I was beginning to think that maybe I should renew my contract, that I was being a selfish bitch to turn my back on all the kids with their heads stuck in their cell phones, that I should do a bit more for society and share the burden of the work life with the millions of others out there doing the same thing, to, uh, pay off their brand new cars, which is what I think, too, like, fck, that 18k, I could live for 16 years on that and you just bought something that isn't even a hatchback that you can sleep in!!
Some friends, the chick got a job, stupid hippy chick, bitches and moans about being a mother,but then wants another to add to the two she already has, well, she got a teaching job, ooh,paid 57k a year, so bought a brand new people wagon, we said, doh, maybe you should save some money first, invest it somehow, you might lose your job, doh, she lost her job the following year, had to hand the brand new thing back, at a loss, of course, but still wants another kid, I've heard the govt. gives you money each month for popping out another 'worker'.
That's for agreeing and being sycophantic, I appreciate it coming from somebody I've always respected and who is way above average intelligence.
LOL, thanks for the kind compliments. I just find that people are really tuned out and that they don't question the status quo.
My favourite untruth is that we are "free". I'm pretty sure that when you have no choice but to work a 40 hour week (and if you want to better your lot in life by getting an education you have to pay through the nose to get it).
Freedom means choices. Most people do not have choices.
If you can get your hands on it an excellent (and rather existential) look at this is the movie "My Dinner with Andre" which is, I think, my favourite movie of all time.
Anyways, hang in there: chin up. Let the haters hate...
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