Good Evening

I'm not very good at hiding my feelings because there's a supermarket nearby called 'Feel' and I can see the sign for it if I stand on the evil communal garbage can.

I just took a 'Milky Rose' bath.
I spent an extra 150 yen for a better quality bath salt - 298 yen, instead of 158 yen.
It's worth it because I spend a lot of time in the bath.
Whilst bathing and marveling at the 100 yen LED light I bought today (I went back and got two more) I thought to myself, 'You are the lowest you have been in your entire life. You totally failed at the relationship and you also became a mean and nasty person. However, you are not thinking about ending your life.

This is indeed a huge step forward, maybe not for mankind, but at least for stray cats around the globe.'
Given that I am utterly and completely (which means the same thing) smashed to the core, the only way is up.

My new mission is to get into shape again.
I have sworn off wine and beer from two days ago and am weaning myself off the booze with a bottle of 12 Year Glenlivet.
I am also going out for bike rides as soon as I start thinking too deeply about how miserable I feel. Keeping myself busy by cycling around the 'hood, somewhat helps and certainly passes the time.

Today I did a spot of temple hunting but there doesn't appear to be any old temples in this area. The two I found were modern-looking.

I also visited a park which is just down the road. It has fun rides for 100 yen a pop. I will go on Monday or Tuesday, when there will be fewer people, and ride the Ferris Wheel.

It's nearly October.
I read national rags based in the UK.
I am very lucky I am not your average GB person.
Even though I have failed big time at love, at least I will have freedom eventually.
Freedom at 43.

I only hope that my spirit returns, as I dread reaching freedom feeling like I currently feel; which is empty and fcked up inside.
Step by step, that's all I can do.
Cry me a coy pond.
I just had an evening enema, took a lingering bath, and will now finish watching a movie I started watching last night. It was actually quite funny, a British movie called 'Attack The Block'.
However, I hypnotised myself to sleep by mistake when I set-up the 'white noise' gig that I use recently; 12 hours of white noise. I sleep so deeply to it.  I start to fall asleep as soon as I hear it, and last night, even though I hadn't finished the movie, I heard it prematurely, and well, it knocked me out.
Night camper.