I've been a friend to nobody this year.
I just arrived in Japan, worked, and live by myself, talk to myself, have no friends I meet.
There are people I could have contacted. But I didn't.
It is because I don't want to be here so I pretend that I'm not here by cutting myself off.
I'm fcked up.
I am obviously depressed and merely going through the daily motions to reach the final goal of freedom, whilst coping with crappy emotional rare Japanese white birds on a daily basis.
What I'm trying to say is, why break a habit by going out tonight, when it's just not in me.
I cannot be social.
I have become a freak.
A loner.
Oh well.
This is who I am right now.
A bad friend.
A hermit.
Getting through a year that I pretty much cannot bear to look in the eye.
Bluh.
I just arrived in Japan, worked, and live by myself, talk to myself, have no friends I meet.
There are people I could have contacted. But I didn't.
It is because I don't want to be here so I pretend that I'm not here by cutting myself off.
I'm fcked up.
I am obviously depressed and merely going through the daily motions to reach the final goal of freedom, whilst coping with crappy emotional rare Japanese white birds on a daily basis.
What I'm trying to say is, why break a habit by going out tonight, when it's just not in me.
I cannot be social.
I have become a freak.
A loner.
Oh well.
This is who I am right now.
A bad friend.
A hermit.
Getting through a year that I pretty much cannot bear to look in the eye.
Bluh.
1 comment:
why are you here if you don't want to be? What has that to do with the final goal? (sorry, new to this blog)
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