Compared to what I know I am capable of, my life this year sucks big time, indeed, it is the worst year of my life so far.
It sucks big time.
Sucky sucky sucky.
Yet I get through each day.
I work, I look forward to coming home to wine and food, I sleep.
Pathetic.
Pathetic.
But I get through it because The Other Side Of Living is on the near horizon, and I am only 43 and then that will be it for me.
No more work.
I guess doing this year was a gift, like getting sick in 2003 was a gift.
There was a silver lining for both.
For the latter, I got to spend some quality time with my unbeknownst to me, or he, soon-to-pass-on grandfather.
For the former, I got to know what working feels like again, I got to have one more stint in Japan, and I guess this was a nice thing to happen, because a tiny part of me found it scary that that was it, that I would never be a teacher in Japan again, so I guess, when all said and done, this was meant to be, to finally get work out of my system, and yes, when I wrote 'work' just then, the radio said, 'work', so I guess this year has been endorsed by my fate.
So it's not that sucky after all, even though I feel like there is no substance to each day.
Which is why I drink.
And wow, this Crianza 2005 is damn good.
It is almost black in colour.
I love 'thick' wine.
Ja ne.
UPDATEIt sucks big time.
Sucky sucky sucky.
Yet I get through each day.
I work, I look forward to coming home to wine and food, I sleep.
Pathetic.
Pathetic.
But I get through it because The Other Side Of Living is on the near horizon, and I am only 43 and then that will be it for me.
No more work.
I guess doing this year was a gift, like getting sick in 2003 was a gift.
There was a silver lining for both.
For the latter, I got to spend some quality time with my unbeknownst to me, or he, soon-to-pass-on grandfather.
For the former, I got to know what working feels like again, I got to have one more stint in Japan, and I guess this was a nice thing to happen, because a tiny part of me found it scary that that was it, that I would never be a teacher in Japan again, so I guess, when all said and done, this was meant to be, to finally get work out of my system, and yes, when I wrote 'work' just then, the radio said, 'work', so I guess this year has been endorsed by my fate.
So it's not that sucky after all, even though I feel like there is no substance to each day.
Which is why I drink.
And wow, this Crianza 2005 is damn good.
It is almost black in colour.
I love 'thick' wine.
Ja ne.
I take the above back. There is no fkcing point to this year. I hate that it happened and it's totally fcked me up.
6 comments:
I guess you needed money which is why you went back to Japan, but couldn't you have worked in Mexico?
There's a big difference between earning $4000 a month, and $700, with longer hours. And actually, it wasn't about earning the money, it was more about having some direction after two years of treading water, and why not gather that direction whilst earning money, instead of continuing to tread but with the feeling of failure coursing through your veins.
This extra money means I won't need to liquidate my properties for about a decade. I'm already 43. Not that long to go in the big scheme of things, and this cash gives me the freedom for the next few years to not have to deal with selling a property, and all that involves. Or I might just marry the love of my life, and donate all I have to Information Clearing House. ;)
*crickets*
My wife and I have a household bank account. It's used for bills, mortgage, nuts, washers, etc. We both contribute.
We *also* both have separate personal bank accounts. I have no idea how much is in hers. I only care that the joint expenses are covered.
Having one's own money is the key to avoiding arguments over it, in my experience. People who either expect to get a free ride or who are unhappy when 100% of their earnings goes into a communal pot and yet their spouse gets to monitor their spending don't last long. You've got to have something for yourself.
I concur, r. This money is also important for me because if he doesn't propose to me within the first week or two of meeting again, then I am on my own and I will really, really appreciate this not insignificant addition to the Freedom Kitty.
Given the shit you've had to wade through to earn it, your appreciation is logical.
But it would be logical with or without some hypothetical proposal option.
Twenty grand is a pretty plush year of anchoring out, or three months of four-star marina docking.
That's how I've come to think of money: it's time during which I can say "fuck off" to the world, except for the bits with which I choose to engage.
That should have read: "it's *purchased* time..."
The idea being that aside from boat stuff, food and decent bevvies, money is most important because having it defers having to work for it and not for pursuing one's interests.
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